How Mindfulness Can Help You Let Go Of Past Hurts and Heal Yourself

Mindfulnes

How to Find Freedom from Your Past and let go of past hurts with Mindfulness

The past can often bring up painful memories and difficult emotions which can affect our future and our entire life. Letting of the past can be very challenging mostly because of unresolved issues. However, remembering the past is not what causes us pain & suffering and ties us to different negative thoughts & emotions.

It is our inability to detach from the attachment to that past which keeps us from finding freedom and happiness. Mindfulness can help us learn how to let go of the past hurts, the past and the attachments related to it by bringing our focus to the present moment and appreciating what we have right now.

“NO ONE OUTSIDE OURSELVES CAN RULE US INWARDLY. WHEN WE KNOW THIS, WE BECOME FREE.” – BUDDHA

Many of us have painful memories that we would rather forget—a difficult childhood, painful relationship, or traumatic event. We usually find ways to avoid thinking about them, so we don’t relive the painful emotions.

The reason they continue to cause us pain and suffering is that they remain unresolved. They fester in our subconscious mind, and manifest themselves daily in our attitudes and actions, and therefore, our relationships.

At the same time, we want to live happy and fulfilling lives. However, as long as these issues remain unresolved, we will never find freedom from our suffering, or realize the peace and happiness we’re searching for.

Here we’re going to look at how the mindfulness practice can help you overcome your painful past. But first we’ll discuss some of the sources of our painful memories, things we do to avoid them, and their cost.

Sources of Painful Memories

“BE CAREFUL WHO YOU MAKE MEMORIES WITH. THOSE THINGS CAN LAST A LIFETIME.” – UGO EZE

There are various sources of painful memories. The main ones are our relationships with our parents, romantic relationships, and traumatic events.

Many of us have strained relationships with our parents. We often feel like they didn’t give us some of the things we needed, such as love, attention, or financial support. Maybe they were neglectful, or even abusive. Whatever the case, we carry many of these painful childhood memories through much of our lives.

If we didn’t have good relationships with our parents, then chances are that our romantic relationships didn’t go much better. If our parents don’t teach us how to have healthy relationships, then we simply bring our lack of coping skills into all our subsequent relationships.

When we don’t get what we feel we need from our parents, we tend to expect those things from our partner. Sometimes we place unreasonable expectations on our partner, which are difficult for him/her to meet. This is where the power struggle begins.

Some of us may have experienced a traumatic event that we never fully dealt with. Some examples are verbal and physical abuse, sexual abuse, or even an accident. These can have long-lasting effects, especially if we haven’t sought professional help, or developed good coping skills.

Things We Do to Avoid Painful Memories

“MEMORIES ARE DANGEROUS THINGS. YOU TURN THEM OVER AND OVER, UNTIL YOU KNOW EVERY TOUCH AND CORNER, BUT STILL YOU’LL FIND AN EDGE TO CUT YOU.” – MARK LAWRENCE

It’s natural for us to want to avoid painful memories, especially if we haven’t yet learned how to deal with them. In such cases, we may feel powerless to do anything about them.

If someone else is the cause of our pain and suffering, then we may expect them to rectify the situation. But this is usually unrealistic. The person responsible may be far removed from our lives by time, distance, or their passing. They may also be unwilling.

When we don’t know how to deal with painful memories, we develop defense mechanisms to help us avoid the feelings associated with them. This usually involves trying to avoid thinking about those memories.

Mind shift.🙏💙

Charles A. Francis is the founder and director of the Mindfulness Meditation Institute. He has published numerous articles, and is the author of the book, Mindfulness Meditation Made Simple: Your Guide to Finding True Inner Peace. He has studied the mindfulness practice with Zen master Thich Nhat Hanh and has over 20 years of experience with mindfulness meditation. He is a speaker and consultant and leads workshops and retreats in Raleigh, NC, where he resides. To learn more, visit: MindfulnessMeditationInstitute.org.

Physical pain doesn’t phase many people…its the mental that creates such problems…

Written by Joanne Wellington

Physical pain doesn’t phase many people…its the mental that creates such problems…if one is mentally hurting themselves through thought why should every one else suffer around them it achieves absolutely nothing “its wrong” …

if your desires are not materializing as quickly as you want, ask yourself :

  • am I trying to hard too make something happen?
  • do I have underlying fears that my dreams wont come true
  • do I have fixed ideas about how I desire my life to be
  • am I blaming someone for this situation so I cant blame myself. fact only you is to blame hard but true.

any “yes” answers indicate a need to let go and surrender for the sake of your well being yourself and all around you…when you wish to control situations or people ( including yourself) its simply a sign of fear and distrust the world can become your enemy…turn negativity into positive…worry, anger, resentment, and the likes are called “negative emotions” because they drain away time and energy… since feelings such as joy  elation and hope increases your power levels, they’re called “ positive.” Worry is a normal human habit. yet its effects are undesirable, including stress, tension, aging, addictions, sleeplessness, and time consumption. And the same is true for all negative emotions. You can transform these feelings into positive ones by remembering this:

Usually anxiety is the basis of negative emotion. It’s a fear of losing something or someone, or having it withheld from you. its an affirmation that some power other than yourself is in control…. its like the more you value a dream, the more important the desire is to deliver to yourself ..but not realizing that your inviting a parade of anxiety if it don’t work out which could march all over your dreams and smother the life force out of it stopping you from going “forth” at that moment. There is a point were every one has to release and realize… if your trust has been shaken and you feel the need for iron clad guarantees, there are better ways than mental `or physical torture witch does begin with yourself then the next person that you feel is hurting you and so forth whether they are or not…( just let go) know that you or this other individual simply needs reassurance that’s it . WHY go through such pain its simply not worth it… only you can manifest the perfect outcome to any situation but it has to be for the best from good intentions the more you’re aware of this truth, the more peaceful you’ll feel. And with peace comes the knowledge that everything truly is under control. . just find balance an important part of our life’s purpose involves making decisions having responsibilities and having duties to perform, sometimes we may wonder how to achieve a balance these different demands they are conflicting for many people …. by holding a positive mind-set even through the bad, the bad is there for a reason it is a main part of our lives it helps change our way of thinking for the better but you have to believe this …love is also an important need a desire in our life and noticing this is a simple route to happiness but you Have  got to give to receive …(positive mind set) love and balance …there a vital investment that pays huge dividends’ in terms of increasing energy, motivation, and inspiration to go forwards in our life.

Make a fresh start in your life today you can change your mind set within a moment, for the better life can only be as good as what you what you want to make it.