What is normal?

I have been thinking a lot about the word ‘normal’ lately

And have been catching up on my feed reading where I have found a mountain of people struggling with situations caused by this word ‘normal’. Whether it be in relation to sexuality and where you fit on the Kinsey scale or whether it be about being gay or whether it be about what is normal for a person of your age it is all very confusing.

Normal, is often perceived by social norms but even that is flawed because it is influenced by how we were raised, the groups we associated with and our personal belief structures. For example I don’t see people who enjoy going out and getting drunk as “normal” or stealing for a living ,challenging and wanting one up on the other all the time however someone who has grown up around that or socialises with people who do that may see that as “normal”  Culturally issues such as being gay may not be seen as normal because it is not common amongst peoples circles and the thousands of years of conditioning that people have received.

I have found that as individuals we each decide what we consider normal. In saying that I have found there is no such thing. Normal simply does not exist. I don’t want to play semantics but to me what we are really saying when we use the word normal or say that some action is not normal is that it doesn’t fit into our reality or it doesn’t fit with what I want in my reality. At this point we can either accept the differences, compromise on behaviours or discard people and situations that don’t meet our idea of normal (reality but loss).

Consider this next time you use the word normal and although I know there are a million scenarios and justifications both legitimate and not, I think and feel the word is just too ambiguous and most of the time doesn’t make a lot of sense.

I just had mention this By society’s conventional standards A very simple idea that can be used to classify abnormal behaviour is personal distress. Basically, if a person is content with their life, then they are of no concern to the mental health field. However, if a person’s thoughts or behaviours are causing them personal discomfort or unhappiness, then they will be considered by the professionals as abnormal.

From small babies to elderly grandparents we have a duty.

The family unit is an inescapable feature of our everyday life .While families should be fundamental to our feelings of wellbeing, they can also be sources of great tension. Whether your problem is troublesome teens, interfering in-laws, competing siblings, demanding parents or ill-mannered children, our guide to family life is an essential tool for domestic survival and it does matter how and what values  you want to choose to put in to
your children before you even start.

Children’s manners are getting worse. Table manners are a thing of the past, respect for elders and parents themselves is out of the window, and so on.

We teach our children to walk, we teach them to talk and, if we want our children to interact  successfully, we teach them manners: not just elbows-in, saying-thank-you manners but how to rub along happily with others – both peers and those of all generations, backgrounds and abilities, and this is what we would consider as normal just remember this: “In children, you will get back what values you put into them ”the same  also works for relationships”.

For parents.

Always try your upmost to lead by example, teach good foundations which is most important. Notice what you dislike in yourself and don’t teach it your children. Be polite at all times, listen carefully if you don’t listen to your children how  do you expect then to listen to you, if you’re a shouting parent you will have shouting kids, act deferentially towards the elderly, show consideration for people in public places of all races. Your
good manners and attitude will inevitably rub off on your children and may bring “back respect” from the lost generation .

From my own experiences of becoming a mother I have learnt the biggest difficulties of today are that no matter what values we do teach our children they are still up against the challenge of the word ” normal” and what is normal as they are always around influences of all sorts. As I said earlier in the article as individuals we each decide what we consider normal… “Normal simply does not exist or does it?”

your views would be most appreciated.

Written by Joanne Wellington for meadum2spirit

Copyright © 2020 JoanneWellington.com copyright  all Rights Reserved.

DON’T be to quick to judge story!

A young couple moved into a new house. 

The next morning while they were eating breakfast, the young woman saw her neighbour hanging the washing outside.

“That laundry is not very clean; she doesn’t know how to wash correctly. Perhaps she needs better soap powder. 

Her husband looked on, remaining silent.

Every time her neighbour hung her washing out to dry, the young woman made the same comments.

A month later, the woman was surprised to see a nice clean wash on the line and said to her husband, “Look, she’s finally learned how to wash correctly. I wonder who taught her this?”

The husband replied, “I got up early this morning and cleaned our windows.”

And so it is with life… What we see when watching others depends on the clarity of the window through which we look.

So don’t be too quick to judge others, especially if your perspective of life is clouded by anger, jealousy, negativity or unfulfilled desires.

“Judging a person does not define who they are. It defines who you are.”

— Jonathan Kestenbaum

A wish,

A wish for you,

This week I wish for outrageous giggles with my kids, and peace for my friends. It has been a very long, difficult week for so many I love. Can’t help but pull out this old but favourite quote….

May today there be peace within.

May you trust that you are exactly where you are meant to be.

May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith in yourself and others.

May you use the gifts that you have received, and pass on the love that has been given to you.

May you be content with yourself just the way you are.

Let this knowledge settle into your bones, and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise and love. It is there for each and every one of us.

Have a wonderful week.! Wishing you health, peace and empowerment.
Xxx ~J.W~ 🙏🏻💙

☆҉‿↗⁀☆҉☆love☆҉↘‿↗⁀☆҉ɑղժ☆҉‿↗⁀☆҉☆peace ☆҉↘‿↗⁀☆҉ ✯

Sitting with your pain and knowing your demons!

It is difficult to heal when you are running from your wounds

There is power in being self aware, in sitting with your pain and in knowing your demons, each one by name.

I’m working on myself to become a professional coach and professional mentor, after reflecting a lot, facing my dark side, accepting my wounds, I can tell now and review more consciously that it is because of these wounds that I feel urged to become such a coach – mentor.

It actually feels like becoming the healer I always looked for my recovering … embrace it – why? Because now I know it’s because I had to overcome my traumas and make peace with them first before I could move on.

Have a good day Wishing you health, peace and empowerment.
Xxx ~J.W~ 🙏🏻💙

Copyright © 2020 joanne Wellington.com

Sometimes shit happens, in order to make room for shifts to happen!

Sometime when shit happens, it is a blessing in disguise.

If we were to look at every adversity as if it held a blessing for us to seek and find… we may be a lot less overwhelmed by the circumstances and excited for the growth.

(Treat it like a treasure hunt! 😁)


It is our attitude or perception at the beginning of an issue that has the greatest impact on the outcome.
Mindset and perception are the most powerful tools for success, and we all have equal access!

Have a good day Wishing you health, peace and empowerment.
Xxx ~J.W~ 🙏🏻💙

Copyright © 2020 joanne Wellington.com

Ghost Hunters International… Chillingham Castle

Fair warning: Watching this collection of scary haunted house series in the dark or by yourself is likely to keep you up all night. Or, at the very least, send a chill down your spine—even if you consider yourself the bravest of the brave. Oh, is that a challenge? Why yes, it is. Without further ado, I invite you to watch the following real-life haunted places from the creepiest places around the country. so happy hauntings ahead.